And Then There Were Three
I’ve been a mom of three for a few months. Specifically a mom of two toddlers and a baby. Cecelia is 3. Margaret is 3 and Joseph is 10, almost 11 months. I remember being so excited when we found out we were pregnant with baby #3, but also nervous. For some reason going from two to three kids seemed like it was going to be very challenging even though having two toddlers ten months apart already had challenges of its own. Actually, even though having the first two super close in age was hard, there are so many advantages too!
While I’m still learning what it is like to be a mom to three very young children who are very close in age, I feel qualified enough to give you some tips and tricks to be successful and to thrive as a mom of two toddlers and a baby. A lot of these tips can also be used as they get older too.
1. Take care of yourself so you can take care of your family.
2. Take daily breaks.
3. Evaluate your boundaries & adjust as needed.
4. Celebrate wins.
5. Learn from the hard moments.
1. Take care of yourself so you can take care of your family.
This is a tough one. So often I find myself putting my needs last because that’s what I feel like a “good” mom should do. The problem with this mentality is that I become burnt out really fast when I think that way. I have found that I really need to stop and figure out what I need both physically, mentally, and emotionally.
In the morning during the week, I generally sleep until one of the three kids wake me up. I’m up multiple times during the night. Joseph usually needs to eat at least twice during the night and one or both of our toddlers generally wake up and come into our room.
I’ve read about the advice of getting up early or at least before your kids do so that you have time to yourself before you start your day taking care of your kids. While in theory this sounds like a great idea, when you’re in the toddler and baby stage, I don’t advise trying to accomplish that feat. You’ll run yourself ragged trying to wake up early when you are already tired from a busy overnight. Sleep as late as your children and body let you sleep.
Once downstairs, I go to the bathroom and either make hot coffee or pour myself iced coffee. Iced coffee has become my new obsession. Next I get breakfast for Cecelia and Margaret. Often times this consists of a bowl of Lucky Charms cereal and cups of water. They either eat in the breakfast room or in the living room while watching a show like Daniel Tiger or Sesame Street. A helpful thing to minimize messes is to set down a mat and then something such as a kids picnic table right on top. I generally let the girls decide where they want to eat.
Next, I either eat a bowl of cereal or if Joseph is ready to eat, I pour myself a smoothie. I usually buy the pre-made kind from the store because it takes two seconds to pour it into a glass. While it would be nice to make a home made one, I generally don’t have time time or energy to do that. Keep things simple and don’t over complicate things. Maybe in a few years, when you’re out of the toddler and baby phase, you can make your own smoothies.
2. Take daily breaks.
This might seem like a no brainer but let me explain. Taking daily breaks is non-negotiable. I feel such a difference in myself when I take daily breaks. With two toddlers and a baby, keep it simple. Sometimes I will go into the dining room while they’re in the living room and work on my blog. Other times, I’ll read from one of my many books that I’m in the middle of. I’ve also taken some time to myself in the backyard. Some days I have grandparents baby sit while I run errands or do something fun like drink tea while hanging out in the book store. Other times, I will take a walk by myself or with all three kids. This is an ideal time to listen to a podcast or just enjoy being in nature. Bottom line is whether you leave the house or not, you need to take breaks! This will help you recharge and also be a more patient, loving mom.
3. Evaluate your boundaries and adjust as needed.
This is a very important tip that should definitely not be overlooked or skipped. Say yes to things that are helpful to you in this stage of motherhood and no to things that cause you stress or that you don’t find helpful in this stage of motherhood. It’s okay to speak up and say what works for you and what doesn’t. In fact, it’s more than okay. Sometimes difficult conversations will need to be had but you will greatly benefit from doing what’s best for you and your family.
4. Celebrate wins & find joy.
Reflect on your wins and celebrate what is working well for you! It can be something small or something big! You got your toddler that rarely naps to nap? Yay! Your baby sporadically slept through the night? Congratulations! One of your picky eaters ate an entire section of food off her plate! Awesome!!!
Look around you and what could seem like just another ordinary day to some people could turn into one joyous moment after another or at least moments throughout the day filled with joy. The adoring smile your 3 year old gives you. The tight bear hug your three year old gives you. The giggle that comes from your 10 month old. The kisses you receive before your husband leaves for work in the morning and when he returns home at the end of the day. What joy and wins are you finding in your day today? Comment below and let me know!
5. Learn from hard moments.
This is one of the most important tips from this whole list. You’re going to have days when you want to pull your hair out. Maybe you were up four times during the night and one your toddlers throws a fit during one of those times. The next day you are exhausted and grumpy. Your patience level is at an all time low. This is the time to decide how you will make it through your difficult day because it’ll probably feel like an extra long day. Give yourself grace and take your time. It’s okay to move slowly and to take things one step at a time.
I hope you found these suggestions helpful! Please share with me what tip is most helpful and/or something you will work on this week! Have a great day!
Until next time,
One Blessed Mama,
Marie
Thank you for sharing these helpful tips and for sharing your journey and truth. You definitely have your hands full! Great information for any new parent.
Thank you so much! I rally appreciate your kind words! Yes I do and also so blessed!
Taking daily breaks and celebrating small wins is how I get through everyday. Thank you for sharing this!
You’re welcome and thank you! Keep taking those breaks and celebrating small wins!
Going from 2 to 3 is a big change. By the time you get to 6 it is a piece of cake 🙂
Yes it is a big change! Wow 6 is amazing and what a blessing! ❤️
Your child is absolutely adorable, and you remind me of my beloved mother. Thank you for your heartfelt sharing and advice; I’ve gleaned valuable insights from it.
Thank you so much! I’m so glad you found this post helpful!